Casual dating in Australia, minus the pressure
Casual dating in Australia is for people who actually enjoy dates. The anticipation, the drink, the moment you both know where the night is heading. What they don't enjoy is the pressure that usually comes attached: the sense that every date is a job interview for a relationship. Casual dating keeps the good bits and drops that. You meet, you flirt, you end up in bed if you both want to, and nobody is checking whether you're "the one".
Somewhere between a hookup and a relationship
A pure hookup can feel a bit abrupt. You chat, you meet, you go straight to someone's place. That's great when it's what you want, but some people like a little more ceremony. Dinner, a walk along the beach, a couple of hours of conversation that make the rest of the night even better.
Casual dating sits in that gap. It's dating without the destination. You might see someone a few times, you might see several people at once, and you can let it fizzle or let it turn into something regular. If it settles into a pattern of good sex with one person, you've found yourself a root buddy, Aussie style.
Casual sex Australia-style, with the date attached
Let's not be coy. Most casual dates on Root Buddies end up in bed, because that's what most members are here for. Casual sex in Australia is common, normal and nothing to apologise for. The date part is about making it more fun, not making it more serious.
What makes it work is that both of you know the score. There's no wondering whether a goodnight kiss means a second date or a wedding. If the chemistry's there, you both act on it. If it isn't, you finish your drink, say it was lovely, and get on with your week.
Who casual dating suits
It's made for people coming out of something long, who want to remember what flirting feels like without signing up for another relationship. It suits anyone who travels, because a date in whatever city you've landed in beats a hotel room on your own. It suits the honestly busy, the ones juggling work, kids, study or training for a marathon, because a relationship wants hours they haven't got and a casual date only wants an evening. And it suits people who just like variety and would rather meet new people than settle down, without leading anyone on.
A casual date that ends well
Dinner somewhere small, a bottle of red, and a conversation that keeps drifting somewhere it probably shouldn't in a restaurant. Under the table, a foot finds your ankle and stays there. By dessert neither of you wants dessert. You walk out into the cool air, and they say "I've got another bottle at mine." You both know it's not about the wine.
How to keep it casual
Say it on your profile and say it again on the first date. "I'm keeping things casual at the moment" is a complete sentence. Don't make promises you won't keep, don't disappear without a word, and if you're seeing other people, don't pretend otherwise if someone asks.
The first meet should be easy: a drink or a bite somewhere public, an hour or two, and a plan to get home. If you want more advice on making the leap from messages to meeting, there's our straight-talking guide to getting a root.
Casual encounters near you
The beauty of a casual hookup is that it fits around life, and that only works if the other person is close by. Root Buddies lets you search by suburb, so you can find people near home, near work, or near wherever you'll be on Friday night. Have a look at who's around and keen in your area, or if you're in South East Queensland, read the Brisbane guide to hooking up first.
Casual dating questions
What does casual dating mean?
Casual dating means seeing people without aiming for a committed relationship. You go on dates, enjoy each other's company and often sleep together, but neither person expects it to lead anywhere. You might see one person or several, and either of you can end it at any time without a big conversation.
Is casual dating the same as hooking up?
Not quite. A hookup usually goes straight to sex, while casual dating includes the date: a drink, dinner, a bit of time getting to know each other first. Both are casual and neither comes with expectations. On Root Buddies members do both, and many say on their profile which one they prefer.
How do I tell someone I only want something casual?
Say it plainly and early, ideally on your profile and again in your first conversation. Something like "I'm keeping things casual at the moment" is clear and kind. Most people appreciate the honesty, and on a site where everyone joined for casual fun, it's the expected answer rather than a surprise.
Can casual dating turn serious?
It can, and occasionally it does. If you both start wanting more, there's nothing stopping you. Just don't go into casual dating secretly hoping to change someone's mind. Enjoy it for what it is, keep talking, and if your feelings shift, say so and let the other person decide where they stand.
Date like you mean it, casually
See who near you likes a drink, a laugh and a night that ends well.